


Keep Breathing -Rewritten-

by LexxC



Series: Keep Breathing [1]
Category: Fallout 4
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 20:47:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19411111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexxC/pseuds/LexxC
Summary: A rewrite of the original Keep Breathing..4/1/2020. Started writing again. Sorry I'm a busy lady.





	1. Chapter 1

Screams echoed in the metal chamber.  
It was cold and reeked of stale air.  
Erin Thompson was 19 when she stepped out the vault.  
Her only reason for existence was abducted. Her father shot in cold blood.  
It was cold and wet on her skin.

The first week in the Commonwealth was harsh. A wake-up call to the reality of the nuclear war. It had damned more than just America, but more than likely other parts of the world as well. All this over some fucking resources.

The first day was the hardest. She screamed till her voice went raw and left. Codsworth comforted her as much as he possibly could with a box of macaroni and cheese. 

Something had snapped, changed in the night. Codsworth watched as she walked off to Concord in search of something, anything. She came back 13 hours later, covered in blood, some of which was hers and others. She refused food, and sleep it seemed come morning.

The first week was spent slaving away at repairing Sanctuary. She threw herself into the work to find a purpose. To find anything. Not a minute went by that she wasn’t hammering something together or sweating in the burning sun. Greenhouses and barns were built. Everyone was thankful for the beds and shelter, but they knew something was wrong. The first night it rained they heard a scream that pierced the night, followed by crying. Mama Murphy felt her heart twinge in pain.

She never said Shaun’s name. Almost as if saying his name would be dooming his existence.  
Preston would often catch her siting in silence in her old room. Trinkets and frayed papers laid on the ground, her eyes would usually be swollen and red from tears. Before the bombs dropped, the only thing she had on her mind was taking care of Shaun. She held a small frayed blue blanket with red rockets on it, gently tracing the patterns with her thumb.  
“Erin?” Preston asked in worry, his eyes somber.

_“I promise to take care of him mom,” She cried. Her hand holding her mother’s in desperation. Shaun in Erin’s arms covered in blood. A nurse trying to pull Erin away from her mother. A sharp noise pierced through the chaos, and Nora had passed. The strain of childbirth having taken a toll on her frail body.  
She never thought she would ever have a younger brother, but at 18 she had to learn to cope. Dreams of attending college were pushed aside, as her father had to continue working to support them. _

“You okay Erin?” Preston asked, clearly full of worry. He searched in her green eyes for a light.  
“Yeah, I’m okay”, She mumbled, eyes empty and her head heavy. 

The next morning, she walked through town with a body in her arms. The familiar blue vault suit. The dark brown hair.

It was as if time stood still in Sanctuary. Tears ran down her face, her face beet red from the strain of crying. 

Preston followed her trek to Wildwood Cemetery and watched as she gently laid her father in an empty grave. It was dark now, the sun setting in the distance. The colorful lights had left, and now it was just grey.

When she finished filling the grave, she turned to Preston, one last tear streaming down her face.  
“Thank you, Preston,” She whispered, her voice almost cracking in emotion. The edges of her mouth trying to curve up in a smile, but unable to hold it. 

He stepped forward to place a hand on her shoulder, but instead she fell into his chest. She clutched the back of his jacket, crying softly into his embrace.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead :)

Green eyes met blue and refused to budge. A smirk, and a wink.

“Hey handsome,” Erin slurred, a few drinks too many poured. Her voice full of thirst and desperation. She batted her eyelashes again, her mouth gently opening before she bit her lip.

She sat on a stool at the bar, deep red locks cascading down her back in thick waves. Her face was flushed, and her glass was half full. She wore a harness barely covering her body. Splatter stained the front, dried blood. Her face was young looking, she couldn’t be older than 22 or 23.

Arthur stood there in curiosity, the dim lighting casting a ray of light upon Erin as if it was a halo.

It was the second time that she had ever drank. The first time was a high school party that quickly ended with her throwing up in her friend’s pool. But this time was different. In the new world, she found herself wanting to cope with the pain. Alcohol seemed to be everyone’s method of choice.

Diamond City. Mama Murphy told her to seek help here. But instead she was left with even more questions. The detective was not in his office, security was unhelpful, and now a reporter wanted an interview. Sometimes it felt like there would never be a break.  
And so, she drank.  
A little bit too much at first.

But when their eyes met, there was a spark. A tingle? Butterflies in her stomach? It was a strange feeling. Indescribable. Unknown.

  
Arthur pushed open the door to their rented room, their lips crashed together, soft, and supple to his rough. She stood at 5 foot 2, over a foot shorter than him. He resorted to picking her up, and her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist. With his foot, he closed the door behind him.

  
The night had been a blur. It had started with Erin’s flirting. Arthur looked nothing like the rest of the men in the wasteland. There was something about the way that he filled out the plaid button up shirt. The way the seams on the shirt looked like they were about to burst open. How he managed to stay so fit in the wastes intrigued her and fanned the fire in her heart.

It had started with small talk. First names only.  
He lied, saying he was a traveler in town from the Capital wasteland.

  
“So, what’s the capital wasteland like,” Chin resting on her hand as she leaned in. Intentionally giving him a good look into her cleavage.  
“It’s much better now that the Brotherhood of Steel got the water purifier working. Now there’s clean water for everyone.” He watched her eyes, trying to see where she stood. To see if she would have rejected him without his disguise.  
“Hmm,” She sighed in thought, finger circling the rim of her glass.  
The glimmer of silver caught the edge of her vision.  
“You got a Mrs. Arthur?” She smirked before taking a sip of her whiskey. It burned as it slid down her throat.  
“No,” He stretched out his hand for her to look at, before realizing it would be hard for her to see. Quickly, almost methodically, he took off the ring. Placing it gently in her fingertips.  
“Fancy,” She chuckled. It was a simple silver ring with the Brotherhood of Steel insignia. She wasn’t stupid. Even Danse didn’t have something like this, which meant Arthur must have been higher up in their weird hierarchy.

They talked for a few hours. Until his hand touched hers.

  
Her back pressed against the wall; his hands made their way to her ass. With urgency he laid her on the bed gently. She quickly stripped, all the buckles coming undone. She looked heaven sent. Before the war she could have been a model. It was as if she had stepped out of a billboard.

  
“Please…” She whispered, spreading her slick folds open for him as she laid on the bed. A siren’s call, beckoning. A gasp escaping her lips, before his mouth found hers again. His thumbs cradled her face, tongues entwined, his breath tickling her nose. He hung over her, like a wolf trapping his prey. Blue eyes locked together.

  
He began to undress, but her hands were too fast. In an instant, she had gripped his shirt and ripped it open. Buttons flying across the room with soft pings. He growled, knowing that he would have to stop and buy new clothing before returning to the Prydwen. He quickly pulled off his pants before she could rip them as well.

He knew it was a primal urge. He told himself it would mean nothing. That it would be a slice of freedom from the protection of the Brotherhood. Here nobody knew him, and the rest of the Brotherhood thought he had gotten called back to the Citadel on their way to the Commonwealth. And now he was here, laying with a woman for the first time, a complete 180 to his normal behavior. But something about this woman made him want to do reckless things; maybe it was the way their eyes locked when he first walked in.

His mouth found her left breast, sucking, and nipping while massaging the other. Her moans stroked his ego, before he slowly guided himself into her. It was tight, and unbelievably warm. It took almost all of his self-restraint not to cum immediately. Her eyes widened and a sharp gasp escaped her lips. “Fuck” she whispered, her nails finding purchase on his shoulders, leaving welts.

  
He slowly thrusted, staring into her eyes, watching her reactions. Eyes would roll back; thighs would shake every time he pulled away from her. She would whisper “Oh fuck,” when he hit her womb, bite her lip when he gripped her hair, and clench down when he gripped her by the shoulders to thrust deeper.

  
His hips snapped against hers, and he knew she was close. Her moans seemed to go higher in pitch the closer she was to climax, a vice grip on his cock. Her back arched, and he bucked with abandon until he spent himself inside of her. It wasn’t until he pulled out that he felt the regret. Blood and cum slowly seeped out, her eyelids fluttered before she quickly fell asleep. He left, gently covering her in a blanket before walking out into the wasteland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the Kudos~


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing that hit her was nausea.   
Her left hand reached out to grab anything nearby. A bucket was quickly filled with vomit.

The second thing to hit her was the realization that she had sex.  
More specifically her first time.   
Bits and pieces were hazy, almost as if covered in a mist. “Probably the alcohol,” she thought.

The wasteland had definitely changed her.  
Before the war it was scandalous to have sex before marriage.  
And now she was here in the middle of the nuclear wasteland, with dried sticky cum coating her ass and thighs.   
“Fuck” She groaned, before getting up. It was going to be a long day.

“You okay Blue?” Piper’s eyes squinted in suspicion. She knew that Erin was a loner. A person who barely spoke, lost in her own world. When she did speak, it was only in sarcasm and eye rolls.   
“Huh?” Asked Erin, distracted by the anxiety setting in. What if she got pregnant, or worse got an STD from her one-night stand? She could feel her heart racing, and the nausea came back.   
“You’re spacing out blue. Something on your mind?” asked Piper, stopping in the middle of the walkway and quickly grabbing Erin’s arm. Her skin was cold, almost as if she was barely alive. It was a bit unsettling.  
“Yeah I’m okay,” She paused, feeling Piper’s grip on her forearm. “Thanks”  
The small glimmer of teeth in the streetlights. A true smile from Erin.

The days seemed to drag on. They were no closer to finding Valentine than before. All Ellie had mentioned as a subway station and Goodneighbor.   
Getting to Goodneighbor was the hard part.

No amount of planning could have foreseen the situation they had gotten in.   
Piper screamed out in agony as she ripped a combat knife from her thigh.  
They had been caught by surprise.  
Erin was quickly able to get a shot off at the raider who stabbed Piper but found herself thrown into the wall with a punch. It made her stomach curl, but the adrenaline covered it up.  
She quickly raised her knee to jam it into the other raider’s crotch, before quickly ending their life with a bullet between the ears.  
“Oh my god,” Erin whispered with a voice so fragile. “Are you okay?”  
“Yeah Blue, just peachy” Piper grinned, flashing her teeth.  
She only did that when she was sarcastic.  
A stimpak seemed to help, but it left the women shaken.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you Piper,” Erin whispered.   
The stars glimmering in the night sky as they laid on a random rooftop. Two mattresses and a cooler were all that was left.  
“I should have stopped him from stabbing you,” She spoke, rolling onto her side to face Piper. Subconsciously tucking a strand of red hair behind her ear.   
“It’s okay Blue. You did what you could,” Piper noticed the wavering in her voice, the way it felt as if it was going to crack.   
Their green eyes met, and suddenly it hit her.  
The night was spent with Piper holding a sobbing Erin in her arms.   
Bits and pieces of the story came out between gasps and the tears.  
The night had a way of making things come out no matter how hard you held them in.

She rubbed her swollen eyes, feeling Piper’s embrace.   
She was warm. Which felt wonderful on Erin’s skin.  
Ever since the cryosleep, Erin was always cold. It scared her. Made her wonder if she was truly breathing, or if this was all a dream. Or if she had died that day, along with her father.   
Only time would tell.  
But now, in this moment, she felt alive. Or what she hoped alive felt like.


	4. Chapter 4

The day she met Paladin Danse, it was dark and storming.

She had left for Diamond City in the early morning. The sky was sunny, and it was cool. The sun was high in the sky, a light breeze in the air. It was helpful in Concord, as it helped remove the smell of rotten corpses outside of the museum. Erin had set out with a small backpack filled with BlamCo Mac & Cheese, and cans of Pork & Beans. It wasn’t much but she thought it would be enough until she hit Diamond City. According to her Pip-Boy, she would hit Diamond City in about a day of walking. She hoped to be there before nightfall. 

The day seemed to drag slowly. She made it outside of Concord after about 30 minutes of walking, finding Trashcan Carla lighting up a small cigarette under a billboard. Or what would have been a billboard before the bombs dropped. It was strange to see how even in the apocalyptic wasteland, people still behaved the same way. Still had vices, still engaged in mundane activities. A quick smile and a wave as she continued walking.

Ahead was a small diner, and what looked to be patrons walking up. They stopped when they saw her approach. Erin was lucky that after a month of living in the wasteland, she had learned new muscle memory. She instinctively reached for her sidearm on her hip when they yelled at her, and found herself running to cover behind a tree when the firefight broke out. 

Managing to take a few shots from cover, she found Wolfgang on the ground. He was squirming, screaming, holding his chest. Covering up the three bullet wounds that pierced his lungs and barely missed his heart. Simone laid in the ditch, a lucky shot through her head killed her instantly. Methodically, she walked over to his corpse before putting a bullet between his eyes. Too many mistakes not to learn from.

She was still shaking from adrenaline when Trudy approached her with thanks. Patrick shook in the corner of the diner, withdrawal proving to be too much for him to bear. He looked so thin in the letterman jacket. A small symbol never to get addicted to chems. 

Erin continued past the train tracks, past the Corvega Plant. Right before the Mass Turnpike, her Pip-Boy picked up a military frequency. It was now about 3 pm, the sky a fair shade of blue. Curiosity got the best of her.

She found herself helping Danse against the waves of ghouls that ravaged the police station. Ammo was a scarce necessity, and here she was wasting it on people who may try to kill her in the future. 

Rhys was an angry man, even after helping Haylen provide medical attention. He didn’t seem to care for the new wastelander in the blue vault suit. Erin had tried her best to clean his wound, stitch up his leg, and apply stimpacks. Yet he sat there, glaring at her as if she threatened to take his property. 

They stood in the rain. Danse had started to walk back towards the police station after they retrieved the long-range transmitter from Arc Jet. He turned around, as if in thought. His mouth opened, he paused, and then spoke.

“Have you thought about joining the Brotherhood of Steel?” He spoke, a hint of desperation in his voice.

“I would have to think about it.” 

“If you decide to join, you know where we are.”

“Can we at least walk back together?” She gestured at the rain, starting to feel her body temperature drop. She would have to change out of the vault suit soon.


	5. Chapter 5

When the dawn cracked, they packed up.

“Everything okay Blue?” A worried Piper asked. Her jacket had been patched up with various colors, blue, green, yellow. The colored threads a stark contrast against her red leather coat. Spare thread was hard to come by in this world. Especially the right colors. Her leg bandaged after the knife wound. 

“Huh? … Yeah…” Erin replied. Lost in thought. The Brotherhood of Steel insignia ring in-between her fingertips. Dangling on a spare ribbon, wrapped around her neck. Emerald eyes staring at silver linking them. 

He had forgotten to take it back after that night. Now it stayed as a token. It was like a strange exchange. Her virginity for a ring. Just like the old days before the war. Picture pretty housewives giving their life for a man, who they knew would eventually stray. It was strange how society always ended where it started. A big circle. 

Tucking it back under her harness, she put her hair up into a ponytail. During the fight last night, a raider had tried grasping at her hair but she reacted with a bullet in time. A ponytail would be easier to manage, but a bun was impossible with the amount of hair she had. It still hung down her back right above her ass. A physical manifestation of her time in the wasteland. Her hair was now lighter. Not as dark auburn as before, but now a lighter brown-orange hue. 

“We should reach Boston Commons in about 30 minutes. Nobody ever comes back from there. We have to be careful,” Piper sternly warned. A short cigarette lit in her mouth. Possibly her last one. 

-

The vault in the subway tunnels was massive. It felt like they spent days walking due to all the stairs and the turns. It also made her heart hurt. The way she was put on ice was so different to this vault. All the beds and the toy cars from children only made her think more of Shaun. How old would he be now? Still a baby or would she have to make up for years? 

When they left the subway, their silhouettes were bathed in the moonlight. It was Erin’s first time seeing a full moon since she thawed. It was bright and threatened to blind her in the darkness. 

“Let’s talk back in Diamond City,” whispered Valentine. An ironic name. But the wasteland was full of irony wherever you looked.

-

“Take me to Kellogg boy.” She growled. Piper and Valentine in tow.


	6. Chapter 6

For three days and three nights, they traveled to Fort Hagen.  
Through the trees that glowed blue at night, through mole rats nests. Through slick steep mountains and plenty of mud. It was caked on her armor, but it rained the whole time. Almost like an omen of his impending death. 

They slept in the staircases, in the tunnels. Anywhere there was a bed and cover from the rain. They ate cans of beans and spam, anything they scrounged along the way. By the time they made it to Fort Hagen it was daylight. The journey was long and exhausting. Piper and Erin had taken their turns on the cot, with Valentine and Dogmeat as the lookout. 

Covered in blood, wounds, and mud, she fell asleep.

They slept in the building across the street from the entrance, scooting a corpse off the thin mattress. The roof was half gone, but it was better than nothing. 

She was exhausted. The rain settled into her harness, her armor. It left a chill on her skin. She was getting sick. Nausea came fast when she awoke. Smells seemed to make it worse.

It didn’t help they were in the middle of the wasteland. 

\- 

It took her an hour to find the entrance into Fort Hagen in the darkness. They had decided the night would provide better cover than the day. There was no way to determine where he was watching.

Another hour to get to Kellogg. She stared at him in his cage. Intimated him. She left fire and bullet casing in her path. Her body felt like it was going to break. Burst into fire. Muscles strained, joints ached, her chest felt like it was bruised. The nausea continued. 

It took her five minutes of talking to blast him to bits. A concealed grenade she tucked into the palm of her hand, before dropping it at his feet when he refused to give the location of the institute.

The synths were easy to pick off with Piper and Valentine’s help. Dogmeat helped them find Kellogg’s splattered torso. His head was mostly intact. 

Methodically, Erin stripped him for parts. Taking great pleasure in knowing he died at her hands. Revenge for dad. 

-

When they stepped out onto the roof, it was bright and sunny. Blinding.  
Then the Brotherhood of Steel overtook the sky. 

She vomited over the railing. Chunks falling down to the roof below. 

Piper and Valentine gagged behind her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, been dealing with depression, school, & work.

It took them five days to get back to Diamond City. 

All Erin wanted when she got back was to take a shower. She was covered in mud, sweat, and dried blood. After a week of walking from Fort Hagen, she decided one day to clean and get everything in order was okay. She hoped that Shaun would understand. Wherever he was. Wherever the institute was. 

She wanted to find Shaun as soon as possible, but also knew that straining her body this much would lead to her death. Piper lent her steel bathtub to Erin, allowing her a much-needed bath. The warm water felt soothing on her achy muscles, and she found herself falling asleep in the tub. The sound of Travis’s voice in the background wafting in from the radio.

The next few days in Diamond City felt like a weird dream. Time moved fast and slow at the same time. She was becoming more and more aware of the amount of time that they spent in each place. Each night before bed she would measure her productivity in terms of items sold, furniture purchased, tasks completed. Piper spent her free time in Diamond City writing about how they tracked down and killed Kellogg. How he was an institute spy, and how to beware of men in black trench coats. Piper had never sold as many copies as she had that week.

Valentine spent time with Ellie, which only made Ellie’s love for Valentine grow stronger. She refused to say that she loved him, but would make sure to keep his office clean for him. Take care of him in the little ways she knew she could. Erin had tried to speak to Valentine and caught glances of Ellie staring at her. Erin worried that Ellie would be jealous of the amount of time that they spent together, but she only saw Valentine like a father figure. She wasn’t sure if it was because he was prewar, or if it was his voice. Everything he did, he did it to help her. Erin hoped that one day she would be able to return the favor. But for now, she just made sure to keep her distance.

After the first week in town, annoying nausea seemed to creep in. She felt fine physically but found it difficult to keep food down. Even the smell of Takahashi’s noodles gave her nausea. Piper nagged at her to go to the doctor. Erin whined, saying it wasn’t worth it to go for something so minuscule.

All she wanted to do was to clean up her new home and rearrange the furniture. It gave her a sense of normalcy in all of the craziness. 

“I’m fine Piper. Please stop worrying,” Erin pleaded. She was busy searing brahmin meat on her stove. The meat sizzled in the pan, the smell filling the house.  
“Please just go to see Doctor Sun. Let him check you out.” Piper moved closer, getting up from her seat at the kitchen table to rest her arm against the countertop. A foot away from Erin’s face.  
“I don’t want to.”  
“Just please go, for me?” Begged Piper as she grasped Erin’s forearm. She was short of being on her knees in front of Erin.

Over the course of their time together, Erin grew more and more on Piper. They shared secrets together, bled together in the field, and slept next to each other. They were sisters from different times and places, but their bond united them.

Begrudgingly, Erin went to see Doctor Sun.   
-

“You’re pregnant.” 

Erin’s heartbeat seemed to skip a beat, as the shock began to sink in. Then everything began to fade. Piper’s worried voice seemed to fade into nothing as fear set in. 

She knew who was the father. But he made it clear that he would never be in her life again. She knew that when he walked out of the inn, leaving his ring on the nightstand. The red stains on the bedsheets, the wetness between her legs, the bite marks on her neck.

He left her all alone.

The warmth of Piper’s hand on her shoulder comforted her. The grasp was firm but gentle at the same time. 

“You’ll be okay Blue. Right, Doc?” Piper stammered, her voice almost breaking at the end. 

“You need to rest, and take care of the baby. Take Rad Away before eating anything, and drink purified water if you can. The most important thing is getting enough vitamins and minimizing your radiation exposure,” Dr Sun stated. 

All Erin could think about was trying to protect the new life inside of her.


	8. Chapter 8

The next few days were filled with numerous doctor visits. Dr. Sun wanted to make sure that she was as healthy as she could be before letting her venture back out into the wasteland. That meant blood tests galore. She was lucky that she had managed to earn enough selling all of the armor and the weapons from their trek to kill Kellogg. Otherwise, she would have been in debt to the good doctor. 

When she was cleared to leave, they spent the day before saying goodbye. Every time they ventured out into the wastes, it was a gamble. Some days it felt like the deck was stacked against them. But the house always wins, right?

Valentine said goodbye to Ellie, hugging her. Her face was full of salty tears, her face full of emotion. After almost losing Valentine at Park Station, she made sure to have no more regrets when it came to showing her love. Erin admired that. It gave her hope that one day she too would have a relationship full of love. 

Piper said goodbye to Nat. Nat was so young, that Piper didn’t want to worry her. Every time that Piper left, she said goodbye with such casually. Nat was wise, and knew, but never said how badly she wanted to hug Piper goodbye. In the wastes, life was fleeting. 

-

Dogmeat led the group on their venture to Goodneighbor. They had to get to Memory Den. The small piece of artificial brain was treated like it was gold, or whatever the equivalent would be in the wastes. Erin kept it in a front pocket of her backpack, checking to make sure it was there after every fight and stop. She wouldn’t let something as important as that get lost or destroyed. 

The ground was hard on their feet and the cold of the night began to set into their bones. The road was long and weathered. They were covered in mutant blood, as the entrance to Goodneighbor was in the middle of the mutant infested part of the city. Breathing a sigh of relief, they pushed open the gate.

An unknown man greeted them, trying to sucker them into paying for his “insurance”. Almost in an instant, a ghoul in a red coat came out of nowhere. He strode over to the man confidently, the light shining onto his face from the streetlamps. His face looked weathered but yet chiseled. In a past life, he might have been handsome.

Finn’s body laid on the ground, as the ghoul named Hancock stabbed him in the intestines a few times. His knife stained with blood, was quickly wiped away on the red coat. Erin had heard of Goodneighbor’s “hospitality”, but assumed that it would be her getting stabbed. She didn’t think that the mayor of Goodneighbor would go around stabbing his citizens when they acted up. 

Hastily she said her thanks, before following Valentine to the Memory Den. It was strange seeing it now, in the middle of the wasteland. It seemed almost untouched except for a few bricks missing from the outside. Erin had never been inside in the past, in the prewar time. Her school mates said that a burlesque show was held there every night. Which was not something that a highschooler would be able to go to without getting into serious trouble. 

After Shaun was born, she saw the weight of the responsibilities on her father. He was haggard, growing thinner each day. He would rise early in the morning, and come home late. Knowing how badly her father was struggling, she never complained about having to take care of Shaun or the house. She just wanted him to be able to come home to a clean house and a warm meal on the table. As a result, she stayed out of trouble the best that she could. Learning how to deal as a substitute mother.

Now she was actually a mother.


End file.
